Mindblogling!

I ask myself that quite a bit when I blog really and when I do any kind of social networking.  Its not that I don’t enjoy ‘being connected’ but honestly I really wonder how many of my ‘friends’ out there even really read the stuff I post on my social pages and really whats the point to this blog?

I’ve thought about actually creating content people would be interested in reading and making an actual internet site that would generate web traffic here but then I really think about it and two things come to mind.  I’m not that interested in doing that because this site is just to clear my head more or less and two it sounds like a job and I’m just not interested in keeping to any kind of update schedule because then I’d probably view at as not as fun as when I can just do stuff in my free time.

Blogging and sites like this really drive a deeper question for me though which is really quite a pessimistic but, I think, realistic view that whats the point?  If you look at the small scope, this blog for example.  Whats the point to it?  95% of the people I have friended on my social sites probably won’t read this and if more then 50% do I’d be surprised and I openly apologize.  I do know a couple will read this and I call them actual friends, or at least people who semi-care.  Rambling aside though theres not much of a point to this thing since someday I will lose interest or just stop paying the bill or the system will break and it will be shutdown and more or less in the infinity of the internet no one will notice because I was no one.

If you look at the grand scheme of things the human race is less then a spec of a grain of sand in the sea of infinity and we will strive and most likely just fade from existence in an amount of years…

Now the obvious reply to this is in a way I’m telling people to just kill themselves since everything we all do is nothing.  Its actually just the opposite.  I’m actually saying that what you should be doing with your time and energy is something that is worth exactly that.  I used to play MMO’s and while I did enjoy those I look back at those times and for the most part just see waste.

What is something you’ve always wanted to do?  Try to set aside time for it, learn about it, try to persue it.  Yes, this blog is nothing in the grand scope of things and this site only gets about 5 viewers a month but the reason I do this is for me and for anyone that is really actually reading this to hear what I have to say.  I could be sitting in my chair watching nothing on tv right now or I could be expressing some thought and using my mind in a positive way and just relaying some kind of information on my mind.

I actually derailed quite a bit from the topic of the post but this all still follows it.  In many ways I do love technology as its brought convenience and ‘gadgets’ to my life but in other ways I wish life was like the days before technology really came on the scene.

I can’t compare because I wasn’t around but I tend to glorify the ‘old days’ and just look at centuries past and think how they used to be and how the people lived their everyday life and how really simple it was and how it was really worth it.  Like I said I can’t compare but I can ask you how well do you know your neighbors?  When was the last time you really built something worth building with your own hands?

For the longest time I’ve wanted nothing more from my life then to just ‘get off the grid’ and not have anyone pushing on me in any way.  I want to live in peace and not be bothered.  I want my time to actually be worth something and if I have to work I want to be paid what I know I am worth.  I am sick of having some greedy fuck under value me so they can keep whats left over for themselves.

I can just imagine what the days were like when people had the knowledge and ability to live off the land, to build their own houses, to reap what they sow.  When your closest neighbor was at least 3 miles away and at night all you could hear were insects and the wind blowing.

Now days everything seems to revolve around technology and peoples lives seem to not be able to escape the internet.  I think this might just be human evolution and the way things are going and I can say I’m not that “connected” of a person.  I don’t email a lot of people, I’m lucky to actually get 3 calls a week that are conversation worthy and my facebook has less then 50 friends on it but even though my lack of being connected I still get sick of feeling like the only way to stay in touch is through the means of the internet even if it is the most convenient.

The point is though that through all these friends I’ve never once really had a friend that calls me on a regular basis to see whats up, outside of a current one and that years girlfriends(who recalling I think I did more calling, which I guess is how it should be?).  I’ve had to be the one that does 95% of the calling just to even keep the lines of communication open and see if they wanted to do something.

…………

I’ll finish this later, I have to goto bed.

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NOTE:

This post got pretty derailed and instead of just trimming it and posting it as a single topic I’m just posting it as is and hopefully make a post soon about the 2-3 topics that this one tried to cover.

One idea is that why does everyone need an online presence and the second being how can you tell who really are your friends.  I’m sure theres a third mixed in there but I don’t want to reread this mess to try and find it.

I’ve found after reading this again I need to focus a bit more when I write.  I don’t mind writing longer posts but if anyone actually does come here to read this crap I don’t want them losing interest at the 4th paragraph.

So yeah…  There yah go.